I registered today for the Zumba Instructor Conference in Miami in August. I wasn't going to register. I kept balking on the money side of things but the truth is... I was scared to death of going.
Why? Because I still fight EVERY. SINGLE. CLASS. with feeling like the fat instructor.
I say that and it sounds like I'm whining... but it is a real issue for me. I'm highly insecure in my own skin sometimes. I know once I'm in front of a room of folks I get in to my groove and own it but there are times when the thought of getting in front of that room makes me want to cry.
I'm committed and I keep going back but there are days when I feel like I should just hide in the back of the room.
Thursday night I got to class late and I walked in to a room with 70+ students and I froze for half a second. So many new students. I felt like they were all wishing I was any other instructor. When I got up there though I put my game face on and worked them out and it was one of the hottest classes I've ever taught solo.
So if I feel like that in a class in the studio where I work how am I going to survive a room full of highly trained fitness professionals? I even have minor panic attacks at big master classes... now this?
It's going to be rough but I know it's going to be worth the stock I'll need in Xanax to get in to the groove.
I'm psyched because I get to bring back AMAZING tips, tools and moves from the best of the best. I can't wait to up my game and bring even more of a workout to the Wilson Zumba family!
Classes I'm taking?
- Hip-notic Belly Dancing
- Flamenco Fever
- Master Class with Beto
- Miami Party
- Colombian Connection
- Hip to Strip
- Reggaeton Rebellion
- Zumba® Brazilian Carnival
Other things outside of my comfort zone on the schedule?
Wilson Women's Club 5k - May
TurboKick Certification - Summer?
FitBloggin'12 - September
Run for your Life - October
Not to mention the new tasks I take on at work every day that push my boundaries.
I love it.
I turn 30 in October. Going to be a whole new me by then!
My bubble? Consider it popped and I'm loving the freedom already.
From me to you....
ReplyDeleteMay my mind come alive today
to the invisible geography
that invites me to new frontiers
to break the dead shell of yesterdays
to risk being disturbed and changed
May I have the courage today
to live the life I would love
to postpone my dream no longer
but do at last what I came here for
and waste my heart on fear no more
John O'Donohue
You are amazing, go for it and make it look good!
You inspire me on a daily, sometimes hourly basis. And we have about a million of the same thoughts, insecurities and anxieties. I wish I would have known you were going to convention - I may have given it more serious thought. But if I give you $100 will you bring me back cool things?
ReplyDeleteI am proud of you Sam.