I'm depressed. It's not all "woah is me" and the "world is ending" depression but I am dealing with a bad round of depression.
Nothing in my life is particularly bad right now. I just had an amazing weekend with my Trio Fitness family. Work is mostly good minus some stress about one working relationship. I'm seeing progress in my strength and muscle tone even if my weight isn't moving. I'm healthy, for the most part. I have big plans for travel in the next few months. There's so much good stuff happening.
Life is really quite good.
But I am in a funk I can't snap out of. I wake up in the morning and I have to spend 15-20 minutes convincing myself to get out of bed. I grump my way to the car to go to work. I get work done but I feel empty, and alienated by my coworkers even though I know I'm not. I even have to psych myself up every day before Zumba class. I know that once I get there I'm going to feel awesome but the thought going to class even makes me a little bummed.
I just feel ...Dull. Lifeless. Listless.
I called the doc to ask about upping my dosage of Zoloft and he said not until I come in for my next visit and he will likely wind up changing me to a different medicine all together as I'm already on the highest dose. I was hoping to hold off till I go back in March but I think I need to go see him sooner but I feel like I don't want to make a big deal out of having the blues.
I'm taking my B vitamins like a good girl and my D to help with the lack o sunshine this time of year to stave off the seasonal affective disorder. I'm eating well (most of the time) and still eating comfort foods when I want them.
It just sucks to feel so blah... It's 9 at night and I'm in bed and really sad that I'm not already asleep. I just want to feel normal again.