To Jam or not to Jam...

This evening I an plagued with self doubt.  One of my biggest dreams in the world of Zumba is to become a Jammer.

I want to be able to go around and share my choreography with people all over the state, the country.  I want to hold master classes and Jam sessions and all of the other awesomeness that being a Jammer entails.

Today, I was informed that a call has just gone out for Jammer applications here in North Carolina.  AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

I want to apply.  I know there are going to be dozens of applications from some of the amazingly talented ZINs here in NC and the chances of me getting the gig are very small but... I don't know how long it'll be till there's another chance to even apply.

Since finding out I've been playing the what if game and bouncing back and forth with reasons to go for it and reasons not to.

The big road block?  I'm not ACE or AAFA certified.  I'm planning on doing the group ex cert during the Februrary APEX event next year but that's the weekend before the Jammer training and I don't think that'l fly.

So if I can't do it during APEX, I'm looking at $300 to do the home study course.  I don't know if I can spare that kind of cash.  I already need to get two more Zumba licenses in the next couple of months and I need to be saving up for vacation and general savings and putting money away towards a new wardrobe and Christmas presents.

Still, I feel like I'm using that as an excuse to not take the leap and throw my hat in the ring.

I'm a good instructor. I'm a good dancer.  I'm a pretty good choreographer, too! The local ZINs are never afraid to come to me and say "I want a routine to this!" and I'm always willing to try!

I've choreographed a bunch of fun routines that my students love. Among them:

• A cumbia style pop routine to Tik-Tok by Ke$ha
• A reggaeton to Pin Pon by El Medico
• A cha-cha to Corizon Espinado by Santana
• A cumbia to Loco from ZIN 38
• A pop disco to Knock on Wood - the Zumba cover
• A tango to Material Girl - Madonna
• A Broadway toning to I'm a Woman - Smokey Joe's Cafe
• A pop toning to Boyfriend by Justin Beiber
• A funky toning to Bureo, Bureo - Zumba megamix
• A salsa toning to Conga by Gloria Estefan
• Hip Hop toning routines to Freak by Estelle, Lose My Breath by Destinys Child and Milkshake by Kelis
• A fun soca soul train routine to YOU by Machel Montano

I've got like 6 other routines in the works, an axe, two salsas, a merengue, another cumbia, and a Soca.  I LOVE doing choreography and I am always looking for any excuse to test out my skills on a new rhythm or genre.  I have a sketched out punk/metal/rock toning routine to Keep Em Separated by the Offspring.

I know I have a lot to learn and there's a whole world of music out there for me to dive in to.  BUT what if this is the last cal for Jammers for a long time.  What if this is the only chance I'll have.  Do I really want to wind up regretting not at least trying it, getting my name out there.

There's a lot for me to think about.  I don't have to decide tonight but it has to be quick.  I have to have my application in by November 1st.  And I'd have to have a plan for my AFAA certification in place just as quick.

AHHHHHHHH PANIC TIME!

Goodbye 11. Hello 12. Hello Love.

So maybe I'm a year early for this reference.  Deal with it!

2011 year in review and 2012 wishes:

Really got in to the groove with my new job.  I started full time in July of 2010 but in 2011 I got to do some major projects, work with groups all across the bank and started to feel secure in my job.  I got to travel! I got to do major presentations! I had some major successes and only a few pitfalls.  When 2011 started I couldn't have dreamed I'd be where I am now.  I can only imagine what cool, new, exciting and scary things I'll get to do professionally in 2012!

Zumba! Wow... I got in to Zumba in the second half of 2010 and became a total addict in 2011.  I got licensed to teach Zumba in June and Zumba Toning in October.  I went from a student to an instructor.  I now teach in 3 locations.  There are people who not only like me but who actually go out of their way to come to my classes.  People look up to me, support me and look to me for support.  I can't say loudly enough how honored I am to be part of the Zumba family in Wilson.  I've gained friends in my fellow instructors and in many of my students. In 2012 I'm looking forward to expanding my classes, incorporating more Toning, and getting my Basic 2 and Zumbatomic licenses. I'm also hoping to bring the Wilson instructors together and make us a tighter knit community and working towards some more common goals. 

Everything Chalene Johnson -  Oh man.  Oh man.  I took Chalene's 30 Day Challenge to help me get organized and feel more in control.  It worked!  I also got certified to teach Hip Hop Hustle and fell in love with TurboKick and Turbo Jam.  Starting on January 2 I'm doing a 30 Day Beach Body challenge with some ladies from the Y and I'm looking forward to rocking out to Turbo Jam daily! I'm also ready to get Hip Hop Hustle on the schedule at the YMCA and the studio and to try my hand at PiYo.  I don't think I'll be ready to teach either TK or PiYo in 2012 but I'm looking towards that in 2013... maybe.

Health in general.  If it isn't obvious 2011 is the year I became a total fitness junkie. I mean, really, my birthday present to myself was a weekend of Zumba Toning and Hip Hop Hustle trainings.  I've worked hard with my doctors to get some of my underlying health issues resolved so I can get my weight in check.  2011 wasn't as successful in that realm as I wanted it to be.  I'm smaller and more compact but I didn't see the scales fall in line with that the way it should have.  I can, however, say that I feel better from head to toe.  I have more energy, I feel more balanced and I can do normal people things now without feeling like a fish out of water.  2011 is the year that I stopped relying on my anxiety medications and started really feel in control of my anxieties and fears.  I still get every cold possible and my allergies are totally out of control but I have energy and I feel stronger and more in control of my health every day. I still have some pretty serious hangups I need to address in the coming year but I'm going to do it with the love and support of those that matter most. 

Family.  2011 was not a great year for family and that's something I really want to work on in 2012.  Physically there's distance between me and my closest relatives but, more than that, there's a lot of emotional distance as well.  It's been a rough couple of years for us and, over time, we just fell apart.  I want to be more involved in my niece and nephews lives.  I want to feel involved with my sister and brothers lives.  I don't want to hear everything second hand from my mother.  I've always felt a little out of place in my family.  I'm very different from them in so many ways but they're my blood.  I want to keep them as close as possible.

Money.  Well my first full year in a real job certainly helped my financial situation but it's still been a rough road.  I've been working on budgeting and controlling my spending for the last few months and I'm finally starting to see some growth in my savings account and some progress towards paying off my student loans.  I hope to keep going in that direction.

My big goals for 2012 are as follows:

1. Lose 20% of my current body weight.  That would be about 60 pounds.  
2. Get off of at least some of my medications and supplements.
3. Get my Basic 2 and Zumbatomic licenses.
4. Get me GroupEx certification at the fall Apex event.
5. Reach my savings goals. 

I'm ready for a new year and that metaphoric blank slate. The promise of a new year just opens up so many doors.  It's just another day but it really does feel like stepping in to the future.  All the bad things that happened in 2011 still happened but, as of tomorrow, I can start putting distance between myself and them.  I can say "Oh that?  That's so 2011!"

I mean, I won't... not ever again.

Goobye 11.  Hello 12.  Hello life.